manual of me

/manual of me

This page is inspired from manual-of-me-short-introduction. It is an exercise for the reader to establish the level of seriousness or sarcasm contained within.

Conditions I like to work in

Quiet; headphones on; low lighting.

Coffee machine adjacent.

I don’t hotdesk. Without a fixed place, my OCD will trigger.

The times/hours I like to work

I’m generally available in CET between 10–12 and 14–17 and 20–22.

Outside those hours, ping me first because insomnia and kids means my schedule can get real weird real fast.

Never contact me when I’m on vacation or sick unless its really urgent (e.g. the Data Centre is on fire, and even then I am unlikely to care because when I reviewed the Disaster Recovery Plan I made sure that it will never be my problem).

The best way to communicate with me

Email.

Quick questions via iMessage or FaceTime Audio if its easier to ask or explain than type.

I eschew Discord, IRC, Matrix, Slack, and Teams, and will only check them periodically; notifications are disabled because it is an antithesis to maintaining flow state. If you are the kind of person who spends all day in Slack and jumps on messages 3 seconds after they arrive, you need to get tested because such behavior is an indicator (but not necessarily) ADHD.

The way I like to receive feedback

Email (or if code-related, raise an issue or write a PR)

Request a video chat.

Request a IRL meetup: I’ll bring (good) coffee, but you’re responsible for croissants and/or schnecken1.

Things I need

Time to reflect because: measure twice cut once.

Things I struggle with

Pointless bureaucracy.

Presenteeism.

Ceremony over delivery.

People who need constant validation; if you are that insecure, seek professional help.

People who use the phrase “learnings” or “writings”. Stop with the corporate speak, or I will circle around to this during your performance review.

How everything these days has to be “positive” and nobody wants to hear any “negativity” because skins are so thin and everybody is offended by their own shadow. If you don’t want to hear anything that is un-positive, don’t screw up too badly.

Things I love

Working with professionals who just get on with it and deliver on time.

Other things to know about me

I am generation x. We have a reputation, and there is no proof. Deal with it.

I am incoherent before the second cup of coffee in the day.

Dutch honey stroopwafels make things better; Belgian white chocolate FTW.

INTJ.

Tabs not spaces.

as an alternative, pain aux chocolate are acceptable ↩︎